i very seldom get embarassed because it takes a lot to embarass me. usually it is my friends that get embarassed and i sometimes have to coax them on to do something. however last night i think i was embarassed. as many of my aol friends know i always have my bedroom window open year round because i like fresh air. because my window is open i never close the curtains because mainly there are only two houses nearby and they are both lived in by two seventy year old men. the next nearest house is probably five miles off or something like that. i never thought there was a need to close the curtains because no one ever comes by here. anyway i was reading a playboy in bed...yes you guys girls read playboys too...anyway i got in that mood that many of you guys get in to so i went to the dresser and got some baby oil and a member of the jiggles family out. well miss pris and this jiggles fellow started up a conversation as i was looking at the pictures. unfortunately i am one of those unlucky females that takes a very long time to climb to the top of the mountain. so this jiggles guy and miss pris continued their conversation for a long long time. i got mad at miss pris for carrying on such a long conversation so i had to sit mr jiggles down and slap her around for a bit with the flat of my hand. after a few minutes of slapping she finally started to get the message so i let her and the jiggles guy continue their conversation on the condition that the remainder of their conversation would soon come to a climax. anyway i soon started climbing that mountain slowly then faster and faster and i reached the summit enduring a really big explosion and i felt the earth violently move below me. well miss pris was was on a terrific roll and as soon as i got to the bottom i had to get in the elevator and go back up again. well i was all sweaty with all that excercise of running up and down th side of that mountain that i had to stop the conversation in mid arguement and i threw that jiggles guy all the way in the hallway and he hit the wall in the hallway so hard i thought he was going to pearce the wall. well i was so selfish and greedy that i wanted to go back up the mountain a third time if only my heart could take it without having a heart attack so i could tell miss pris was willing so i had absolutely no choice but to pat the heck out of her hoping i would not bruise her because she is a very delicate lady. i am not sure but i think i was screaming out loud finally reaching the top of the mountain for the third time when the stupid phone rang. well no way in heck was i going to answer that phone at that point because i was so out of breath that i was seeing spots in front of my eyes and i think i would have fainted had i sat up in bed. i wanted to enjoy the mountain climbing as long as i could but that stupid phone kept ringing and ringing and of course my answering machine took this time not to work. after about twenty five rings i could not take it any more so i got up and luckily did not faint and with my teeth still chattering with emotion i squished squished squished over to the telepone. well it was nazeer and he was looking out his window and he saw two men in my back yard looking in my window. well i was totally surprized and i did not know what to do. he said he was coming over but i told him not to because i did not want these two men to beat him up or anything like that so i told him to call the police and i would lock myself in the bathroom til they got here. which i did. after about five minutes of waiting i realized i did not have a stitch of clothes on and what was i going to do when they got here. well someone came to my door after about 10 minutes but i did not know if it was the police or not so i just stayed in the bathroom until they came in my house and got me. so there i am with two policemen staring at me in all my glory in the bathroom. i was too stupid to get behind the shower curtains. i did not even think of it at that time. well they had already got the two peeping toms and i got my robe on and they took my statement which was not much since i never saw the two guys looking in my window. i saw them in the police car back seat and they were not men at all. they were two nerdy little teen agers that looked like they were still in junior high. they both looked like they were about to cry. the police took them off and i have not seen them since. this morning some sargent called and asked if i wanted to press charges and i asked if i had to go to court and the policeman said probably but it only be a few minutes. i said no thanks i do not want to press charges. i said this because no1 i was not so upset this morning and i do not want these two boys to have a record or anything like that. and no 2 no way in heck am i going to stand before the judge and those people in the courtroom telling them that i had been masterbaiting in bed while reading a playboy as two punky nerds were watching. that is just not going to happen even though now that i think of it i am telling the whole worle right now. hahahahahhahahahah that is almost funny hahhahahahah. anyway this is who i am and i appologize to no one. so goes another day in the life of ann of hearts. wow wee will this all never end...hahahahahhahah.

hello. if you read my aol blog you know that i change the look of my guest room about every three or four months. i normally change the look of everything including wall paper and carpet and lamp shades and the whole thing. i think this keeps the majic going and always keeps the interest of my guests because i am always changing. as soon as my appointments get use to one look i change it to another completely different than the one before. i have had all lavendar and all forest green and all red velvet and all black velvet. i had plans to change to all gold because i saw some real neat gold wall paper and gold carpet and gold tassels etc etc but about two weeks ago i saw something different and i had a different thought. i was surfing the innernet and i saw glow in the dark stars and a glow in the dark moon and comet with a big comet tail. i thought this would look pretty neat on my black velvet walls. it is pretty dark when you dim the lights. so i have spent the last two days putting all different size stars on the walls in my room. i put a big quarter moon on the wall at the foot of my bed and a big comment on the ceiling mirrors. it is really neat. when i turn the lamps off the room is flooded with dim green light from the glow in the dark univers. it is so kewl. there is really no need to turn the lamp on because there is just enough light for touchy feely etc. i think it is very sexy and adds to the mystery. the comet with its long comet tail on the ceiling mirror really adds to the at mus feer. i am very happy with the new look. so from now on my gentlemen friends (and two females)will really be able to see the stars as they see the stars. with a little help from me of course hahahahhahahhahah.

i have been expressing mothers milk for a long time now. almost five years i think. the only reason i keep doing it is that my friends seem to get some type of erotic kick out of it. it is a favorite with all my appointments but i am simply getting tired of it and that is all. i dont mind sharing with my friends but there comes a time to stop. i mentioned this to becca about a month ago and i thought she was going to hit the roof. she chewed me out for a hour. i think i hit a nerve or something. well i am my own person and i can stop if i want to. anyway that has been on my mind. i guess i will think about it for another while before i make up my mind.

hello i danced at a lesbian bachleorette party today. they were celebrating a lesbian marriage. there was about twenty five lesbians there. i am not sure i will every do that again. that was a jungle fight the whole time i was there. i think i have more teeth marks on my boobs and butt than any male party i ever danced at. they were vichious. if i ever do that again i guarantee i will keep my dancers thong on. first i broke my own rule of getting a extra dancer for parties over 20. that was a mistake. they really wore me out. at least the money was good. i made almost 1600 dollars for two hours dancing and another 600 for the normal bachelor/bachleorette after party party stuff. well i am bushed. i think i can sleep for a week. nazeer laughed at me while ago because i have two really huge hickees on my throat. well i think one of those girls was a vampire. she sunk her teeth into my neck and almost tongued me to death hahhahahahhah well they are lesbians what can i say hahahahhhha

one of the most often questions asked by my appointments is ...does size count. well i am going to ease a lot of mail tension hahahahahahahah in saying this so you can understand. from a phsical point of view you do not have to worry. as far as intnsity of a orgazum size does not matter in the least. it is the attention that my partner gives me that makes a good ohh la la into a great ohh la la. some women take a long time to reach the mountain top so things such as neck kissing and teasing that really helps. neck kissing drives me right up a wall to the ceiling. i really like that. also you need to comunicate with miss priss as much as possible. the more miss priss talks to you the better it is. and remember you do not have to always be sweet to miss priss. there is a old saying that if you spare the rod you spoil the child so you can be as forcefull as you want when comunicating with her. sometimes a good tongue lashing will keep her on the straight and narrow. anyway all i am saying is you do not have to be shy just because you are not the incredable hulk. so stop worrying and enjoy the conversation. one thing to remember is that a woman wants to feel feminine when she ohh la las. so the more aggressive the partner is and the more she is dominated the more like a woman she feels. i like to be completely dominated. i like to be told what to do and when to do it. and the plus side is that way i know i am pleasing my partener.