hello
most of you know that i have epilepsy. i have seizures almost every day. they are short maybe four or five seconds long. i average probably three a day so that is a total of 15 seconds a day or so. i guess that is not to bad. i dont throw fits or anything. i just stare into space and act like a robot or zombie for a few seconds. that is a perfect time to pick my pocket if you are a robber hahahahhahahahahha. all my friends are use to them so they do not get all grossed out. i almost never go to the doctor i just live them out. i take three medications for epilepsy. i al ter nate between them. when one does not work i take a different one. i normally take dilantin or feltabol or keppra sometimes. there is another one i do not know how to say it. i have had one gran mal seizure in my life. it is also called a frontal lobe seizure because i am crazy in my frontal lobe. i had my one gran mal when i was fifteen. well it was a very bad one. i almost broke my neck by throwing it back so hard and so fast. my tongue also stood out and i bit the end of it off. you can not swallow your tongue with a seizure but you can bite the end off which i did. so i do not have much of a tongue and it is difficult for me to talk. i can eat ok and i can kiss ok hahahahahahhahahahahha well kissing is important to me. anyway i was in the hospital for a long time and i wore a neck brace for almost five months til my neck and back re a lined. my tongue got infected where i bit it and the hospital had to removed some of it. boo hoo anyway most of my friends can understand me when i talk but not everybody. epilepsy is when the electricy in your brain does not work right. it shorts out and goes in all different dirrections and sometimes i do crazy things. oh well i am crazy anyway so many people can not tell. anyway speaking of testikcals...nazeer is mad at me and has been mad for a couple of days. nazeer is like a little seventy five year old baby hahahahahahahha yes he is it is the truth. i have always been able to cheer nazeer up when he is mad because i just tickle him or boost his ego and he acts right but he is really miffed at me so i have not been able to get him out of his mood. i ohh la la with nazeer every day almost. ohh la la is not so important to me but it is really important to him. nazeer likes to dominanteteate because he is the male and that is ok with me because i like males who take control. he likes me to keep all the liquids inside me when we are done and it is really important to him that i squish squish for a while. it is that male ego thing and it is really strong in people from pakistan where he was born. plus people from pakistan have really big liquid producers (and no i did not say balls because that is gross) hahahahahhahah well anyway they produce lots and lots of that vitamin D stuff and nazeer does to. well i forgot and took a shower. well i did not mind carrying his squigglies for a while i simply forgot that is all. well he came in the shower and started yelling that packinstanese and i could not even understand him. so he left in a huff and has been mad ever since. i went over today and tickled his neck for about twenty minutes but he did not give in. well i will probably have to do lovey dovey tomorrow and tell him i am sorry like a weak little kitty kat but that is ok i donot mind doing that. i will just squish squish around the house tomorrow so he can hang his trophy on me and everything will be ok. nazeer is the old kind of thinking that likes his females barefoot and naked all day. oh well. give him what he wants. see ya later bye bye

well enough of that criptic stuff. lets get back to just plain talking. ok? ok hahhahahahahahahhahaha

yes it is true. my tomato bush finally wilted today. she tried her best to keep a stiff upper lip but with wave after wave after wave of heat beating down on her she finally petered out. there was no use in watering her any more. so i just removed the hose and walked away. but first i let all the neighbors come over and pick all the tomatos they wanted. several of my friends simply sat in my living room and ate of the fruit while we watched those special movies on my dvd. i even had one female friend come over and oh my gosh she chewed the tomatos until i thought she was going to burst. well at least they all went home satisfied and full as tics on a tit mouse. well so much for my garden. i am wondering if i let the leaves grow in the future if the plant will last a little longer. as many of you are aware i trim and cut the leaves and brances almost daily. mainly for the sake of appearance. but i think i will let them grow out in the future. maybe the plant will last longer that way. i will begin a new tomato bush tomorrow but keep in mind it is still summertime. i just hope she does not become so overburdened with everybody pulling and tugging the fruit that she dries up again. oh well there is always next year. and i like spring planting as much as summer picking. i hope you guys enjoy your salads. bye bye

hi
i definately went over the line on this one so i deleted it. i guess my mind is blurry. so you will have to guess what this one was about. i saved it so e mail me if you want to read it. bye bye

well after looking again this is not so off the wall. it is only about some guys playing baseball and tennis so i will put it back in.

oh my gosh i died and went to heaven. i woke up in a great mood monday. i had doubled and maybe even tripled my crazy medicine because i was in such a stooper over the weekend with that black bird on my wall and all and i guess the medicine hit me all at once because i think i woke up drunk or something and i was so completely light headed. i went jogging early monday and i hope i put my shorts and top on because all i remember is floating on a cloud the whole time. i guess my feet were touching the ground but i am not sure of anything because i could not get my wits about me. i think the cows were sort of suprized because i remember patting them on the butt whenever i passed one on the jogginhg trail hahhahahahahahahaha. all the cows are used to me because i jog every single day but i normally do not fondle the cows hahahahahahahaha. they may not let me arond them next time. oh well i was in such a good mood. anyway speaking of bally balls i went to town on the bus or i flew i cant remember and i ended up at the park by tcu and the zoo. well i did not mean to get off the bus there but the park was full of college guys exercising their test ta ster rone and well miss pris was screaming at me. apparantly she was not that drunk because she made it known that she wanted to play ball with those guys. well what was i to do because we were in the middle of a park on a sunny day. so i just told her to shut up and keep her tongue between her cheeks and to stop drooling all over everywhere. but it was useless because since when does she pay attention to what i say. oh my gosh you would think she would grow up a little and act more mature. she is such a twit. well as i sat under a tree watching those guys play baseball i started sweating very much. i simply could not take all that heat building up in me. wow i got so hot sitting there that i had to keep twitching and twitching my knees hoping no one was looking at me. well i did not want to look like a geek with a knee and thigh problems. its the texas heat i tell ya hahahahahhahahahaha. anyway i had a difficult time keeping my friends chin dry because she kept drooling like a puppy dog as she watched those beautiful ball players running around the ball field. i guess it was a hard ball game because those balls were very hard looking. well not to worry because in the other ball field behind me the guys had those really big fat balls. i think the bigger the balls the softer they are the smaller balls are the harder balls. anyway my experience with both kinds of balls tell me that is probably correct. i was in heaven watching those balls hop around. hey is that why they call them ball fields. thats pretty kewl. i bet the term ball field was invented by a female probably in heat hahahhahahahahhaha. that is very funny to me. anyway i was so out of breath watching those guys with their big and little balls i thought i could not take it any more and oh my gosh oh my gosh they brought out those big fat bats i almost pooped my pants. no way was i going to be able to watch batting practice without stroking out. hahahahahaha oh my oh my so i just closed my eyes and tried to take a nap under that shade tree but i kept hearing a kerplunk kerplunk kerplunk kerplop and something hit my foot. well oh my gosh it was a furry little ball. one of those beautiful college guys who i am sure was under 21 well maybe 21 well maybe under 21 anyway a tennis player had hitting his balls against a back board because his partner had not arrived yet. so i picked up that furry ball squeezed it a few time and threw it back to him. my goodness that guy was also so beautiful to me. so miss pris and i watched that guy whack his balls agains that back board over and over and over til miss pris was so all consumed with awe and wonderment over his most perfect form that she voiced her admiration in a most pleasant and breath taking way. i can not lie if this was the olympics i would give that tennis player a 10 and miss pris a 11. oh my oh my. i had to leave or die. well my friend should know not to carry on in public like that so i had to punich her or at least teach her some manners on the bus on the way home. well i did not know how else to teach her some disipline except to slap her all the way home. which i did. my friend had to be taught a lesson. and i dont care who was looking. hahahhahahahha

p.s. well maybe i might of ex a ger ated a little on this one hahahhahahahah well i can not help it. i am just a silly rabbit. besides i am abso lutely fas in ated by male sports. there are so many diferent types of balls to choose from on the playing field whether at the park or at home. i can not make up my mind which ones suit me better. i like them all. bye bye

it fluttered and swooned and then it floated as if a cloud of invisible mist. silent except for the sounds of its wings. from no where it came. and the suns light froze. little specks of the smallest dust particles flaying upon that lighted beam. glued, nailed, their little arms grabbing the beam that once was but now is no more. falling to the floor. helpless. spread wide its blackest wings the swan of bleakness sits upon my den couch. reaching from wall to wall those giant feathers stretched like a dragons smile. evil, lonely, strong and fierce. the stare of that black bird overpowers me. and i am afraid. slowly its talons open and it reaches those giant claws to my face and grabs my cheeks and forehead and chin and little by little squeezes. but the black swan is only teasing and releases me. yet that unapproachable stare, that look of emptiness, those eyes of a black plastic doll peer down at me from the ceiling. and i am a captive of that dread once more. so swift it came. so sudden its arrival. unexpected. yet there it is in front of me. and i can feel the heat of its breath on my neck. and i want to push that bird away. i want to impale its chest upon a vampires stake. i want cover its head and choke it to death. yet all i know is that my den wall is now covered in feathered shadows. and there is nothing i can do to stop it. nothing. but wait til it is over.